


The Way Back to You

by endeni



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Blanket Permission, Future Fic, M/M, Podfic Welcome, Time Travel, Wordcount: 1.000-5.000
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-13
Updated: 2016-04-13
Packaged: 2018-06-02 02:18:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,887
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6546499
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/endeni/pseuds/endeni
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Magnus has been waiting for Alec for over a hundred years.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Alec

**Author's Note:**

> Based on the tv show canon. I haven't read the books but I have taken inspiration by what I've gathered on events to come by the wikia. ;)

Alec is in the training room, pouring out his rage and helplessness against the punching bag.

It's been months. Months since Jace had gone away with Valentine and they still hadn't found anything, hadn't found _him_.

Alec throws another punch. Then a kick, then another.

There are rumors going around the Shadow World, of Valentine abducting Seelies and warlocks, of demon summonings.

But by the time they arrive to check it's always too late, the trails gone cold.

He and Izzy had been negotiating with Meliorn and the Seelie Court. Mostly Izzy, he's not all that welcome among the Seelies anymore. But even working together they hadn't had much luck stopping the initial wave of Valentine abductions.

There's nothing more for him to do, for any of them, but train and wait for Valentine's next move.

The Clave hasn't appointed a new Head of the Institute yet and with his parents and Lydia back in Idris the responsibility of Acting Head is back on his shoulders.

It's like the Clave is waiting to see how things will shake out too and Alec hates this game of waiting.

Sometimes, he finds himself missing Lydia like a lost limb.

Not the idea of marriage and all that would have come with that, but her calm, reliable presence.

He doesn't think of Jace, how he used to be the one Alec relied onto.

Jace, who's still his parbatai, even if the bond between them has been weakened beyond recognition, so much so Alec wouldn't be able to trace him any more now even if he tried.

Part of himself can't help but think that it's been too long. That if Jace had really gone with Valentine in order to save them, he should have found a way to contact them by now, a way to get back to them.

He can't help thinking that if Alec is staying it's because he wants to.

Alec pauses a moment to catch his breath. He takes the bag into his hand, leans in with his forehead and just breathes, feeling the sweat cool on his neck.

He's so fucking tired.

“Alexander,” Alec looks up at the sound of Magnus' voice, the unique, almost tender way he has of saying his name. He watches Magnus slowly shake his head, one eyebrow raised, “So _serious_.”

Like the sun peeking up from behind the clouds, Magnus' sudden presence brightens the whole room.

“Magnus,” Alec greets him with a bashful smile.

“ _There_ , much better,” Magnus says with a smile of his own. “Now, I know there has been a lot of things for you to deal with but I'm sure no-one would begrudge you a small break.”

“I can't-” Alec starts to say, when Izzy interject from the other side of the room, where she's just started sparring with Raj: “Please, go, you look like you're about to fall over.”

“I-” Alec tries again.

“Go on, big brother, we'll call you if anything happens.”

Alec opens his mouth to reply but no word comes out.

“Promise,” Izzy says with a smile that doesn't reach her eyes but is sweet all the same.

“ _Thank you_ , Isabelle,” Magnus interjects. “As I said, I know we've been all quite busy, but your sister is right, Alexander, you're not doing anyone any favors by pushing yourself to your limits.”

Magnus comes closer at that. Alec swallows nervously.

“Now,” Magnus says taking Alec's hand into one of his own and turning to look at Izzy, “I'll be taking our fearless leader with me for a few hours. Do call if there's an emergency, but, please, be certain it really _is_ an emergency.”

Then, with a smile and a suggestive raise of his eyebrows, Magnus is leading him out of the room.

Alec's eyes fall on their joined hands. He could stop Magnus, of course, but he finds he doesn't want to.

As he looks down at himself, Alec realizes he's still sweaty from training. “I need a shower,” he says, almost talking to himself, and Magnus replies with a playful smile: “Must you, really?”

Alec feels his cheeks burn.

A smirk and Magnus' takes his hand back for a moment.

“Kidding, my dear.”

A graceful movement of Magnus' wrist and they're in Magnus' living room.

“Now, before I push some dinner into you and then put you to bed,” and Alec can't help it, he's blushing harder now, “there's something here I want to show you,” Magnus says with a smile as he moves to a corner of the room.

He comes back with a small box, which he hands to Alec.

“What-” Alec starts to ask as he opens the box. There's a necklace inside.

Magnus reaches in and takes it out.

“I do hope you like the design, I think it's quite a different style from the one your lovely sister is wearing, much more suited to someone like you.”

And Alec can see it properly now: a very long chain with a simple, elongated pendant.

“Please, darling, would you turn around?”

Without thinking, Alec does so. He feels Magnus' hands brush against his neck, putting the necklace on him and closing the clasp.

Alec can feel the weight of the pendant on his chest.

He looks down at the necklace and he's surprised to see that it is indeed completely unlike Izzy's.

 _No_ , he thinks, _unlike Camille's_.

The metal chain is thin and very long, like military dog tags maybe. The pendant, reaching just below his heart, is a regular, elongated shape. It looks glass-like, like a vial or something. Alec takes it into his hand and sees the swirling, sparking material inside ripple with the motion.

And it's warm to the touch. Body-warm, as if it had just been worn by someone else and not sitting inside a box.

“What it is?” Alec asks, mouth open in wonder.

“It's,” Magnus makes a gesture with his hand, “complicated. Let's just say it's my contribution to the cause of keeping you safe.”

Magnus comes closer, “It's a talisman of sort. Should you ever need me, you just have to grasp the pendant and think of me,” and his tone has gone low and deep now and Alec can't think, he's lost into that voice.

“I-” Alec starts to say, “Magnus it's too much, I can't-”

Magnus stops him, placing a finger over his lips.

“Yes”, he says simply and he looks serious now, almost melancholic somehow, “yes, you can.”

And Alec can't resist. Feeling bold, almost reckless, he opens his lips and gently catches the tip of that finger into his mouth.

Then he releases it, pressing a small kiss against it, blood rushing into his hears as he watches Magnus' rapt eyes, hears him take a sharp intake of breath.

Quickly, Alec bends down to capture that mouth with his own.

In that moment, lips against lips, Magnus' tongue caressing his own, Alec feels completely free, like he and the man in front of him are all that matters in the world.

When they break apart, Alec sees that Magnus's eyes have turned yellow, the iris thin and slitted.

Alec's breath catches in his throat.

Then, he notices that the warm presence of Magnus' gift on his chest has grown warmer.

He looks down and sees that the shiny liquid inside has turned to a deep, almost blood-like red. Almost the same shade of Izzy's necklace.

Alec frowns, wanting to ask what's happened when his phone rings, breaking their little bubble.

“Izzy,” he answers and his eyes widen at her words, “We're on our way.”

 

They arrive too late.

Magnus takes them directly to the Silent City. Alec, who's never been happier to have runed his bow and arrow to be summoned when needed, draws them out and joins the fight. Just as Magnus does, throwing bolts of energy by his side, aiming at Valentine's newly created Shadowhunters and Forsaken.

It's clear that the fight is almost over. The City's wards must have been partially broken down but they still aren't letting Valentine's demons in. Even so, the Silent Brothers and the Institute's Shadowhunters aren't enough against the sheer numbers of Valentine's assault. And wherever the Clave's reinforcements are, they're not going to make it in time.

Amid the chaos, Alec sees a blonde head, fighting with his usual grace and deadliness by Valentine's side.

Alec's heart stops on his tracks.

It can't be, he tells himself, while his mind goes to the last time he has fought with Jace. It was on the way to this very place.

He hadn't been able to kill him then, when his Parabatai had been the one acting out of honor and Alec too blinded by his own duty to realize it.

He doesn't know if he could now either.

Alec dispatches two more of Valentine's Shadowhunters, just as Jace reaches for the Soul-Sword.

That's when a Forsaken throws Alec against a wall. He lands on his shoulder and hits his head. The blow knocks him out.

 

He wakes up to Magnus worried face.

“What happened?” he croaks and, as soon as the words leave his mouth, Alec knows the answer. A few feet from him, he sees Raj's dead eyes staring at nothing.

In the distance, he can hear Izzy's voice arguing with several male voices.

 _The Clave's reinforcements_ , he thinks bitterly.

He doesn't bother trying to get up, he'll only end up vomiting on his shoes. He just closes his eyes again, raising a hand to cover them. As if, by doing that, he could become unable to see, to know.

“I'm so sorry, my dear.”

“The Sword?” he asks even if he knows the answer to that question too.

“Gone,” Magnus says and he sounds impossibly exhausted. “Now, try not to move, I have to go check on the injured. I'll be back soon.”

Alec feels the slight pressure of Magnus' lips against his forehead and then nothing, he's left alone with his piercing headache. And his anger, his grief.

 

“How many losses?” he asks once they're back to the Institute. “Wounded?”

“About half of the Institute's members are either dead or gravely injured,” Izzie replies. “The Silent Brothers… they were almost all killed. They died rather than let them have the Sword.” She takes a visible breath, “Alec, it was-”

“I know,” Alec says curtly, “I saw him. What about the Clave?” He presses the palm of his hands against his eyes, willing his stubborn headache to subside.

“They're sending a new Institute Head in the morning.”

Alec sighs.

 _Perfect_.

“I still don't get it,” Simon interjects shaking his head. “So-sorry, I mean, how did Valentine got in? I thought the Silent City was warded and stuff.”

“It is,” Magnus confirms, “but by the time Alec and I got there the wards had been severely weakened. I was granted access with almost no fight.”

“Alec,” Izzy interrupts. “Sorry,” she says to Magnus. “Look, I didn't have time to explain on the phone but it was Jace who tipped us off on their plans, there's still-”

“You mean Jace has just led us into a trap,” Alec replies, not daring to let himself hope.

“Why would he do that?” Clary asks from the other side of room. “He was trying to warn us, I know he was.”

Alec takes a deep breath.

“What if he was?” he says, “It still would have been for nothing because Valentine has both the Cap _and_ the Sword now. And if Jace has really betrayed him, Valentine is going to figure out sooner rather than later.”

Clary's eyes widen in horror.

Alec sighs. “Look, I'm sorry, I- If Jace were dead I'd know, OK?” He licks his lips. “Our bond is not as strong as- But part of me would still die with him.”

He closes his eyes again and for a moment they're all silent.

“He wants them all,” Izzy whispers, looking at Alec and Magnus as if to confirm the horrible realization she just had.

She's right, Alec realizes. Fuck, they must have found a way to the Mirror, somehow.

“What for?” he asks, trying to be reasonable. “You don't think he wants to-”

“Raise angel Raziel?” Magnus asks and there's something terrible in his voice, something like pain. “Why not? I wouldn't put it past him at this point.”

“Wait, what? Guys, you're not making any sense.”

“But he would need the Mirror too,” says Clary, ignoring her friend's sputtering, a look on her face as if she doesn't like the realization she's come to either. _Welcome to the club_. “I thought it was lost.”

“It is,” Izzie says, “But Valentine must have found a way to it. It's the only explanation.”

Alec snorts. “That's crazy, even for Valentine. How does he know the Angel won't just smite him instead?”

“Unless Valentine has found a way to bound an angel to his will,” Magnus says, his tone ominous.

That's when a lick of flame erupts in front of Clary. The flames disappear quickly, leaving behind a piece of charred paper. And Alec recognizes that handwriting.

 

“It could still be a trap,” Alec feels compelled to argue, mostly because someone ought to. And to put to rest the little voice inside himself that desperately wants it not to be true.

“Do we have another choice?” Izzy points out and no, the truth is they don't.

 _And it's obvious we can't rely on the Clave to deal with Valentine_ , he thinks, _they either can't or don't want to._

Magnus just materialized them into a small, dimly lit corridor, the only light provided by a faint green reflection at the end of it.

They follow the light, follow the noise of arguing and fighting. At the end of the tunnel, they find Valentine and Jace. They're struggling in front of a portal, the source of that sick, twisting green light. A fistful of Valentine's Shadowhunters is pressing against Jace at his sides and more demons are coming to Valentine's help.

 _The rest Valentine forces is probably still lying dead inside the Silent City_ , Alec thinks as he runs forward to come to his parabatai's help. _Or rotting back in Hell._

Izzy and Clary join the fight as well and Valentine takes advantage of the confusion to try to jump through the portal.

“No!” Jace screams and, _fuck_ , Alec is the one standing closer to him. He moves to intercept him, to stop him.

He's grabbed Valentine by his clothes but he can't halt the motion propelling them forward, he gets sucked into the portal right after him.

As they hit the portal, Alec's hand comes away with just a fistful of fabric.

 _Fuck_.

 _Visualize where you're going_ , Alec reminds himself desperately. _Otherwise you'll end up in limbo_.

It's already started. Part of Alec is starting to lose his sense of direction and purpose.

And it'd be so easy to let go, he wouldn't have to worry anymore.

 _No_ , he thinks, shaking his head, _focus!_

Alec raises a hand to his amulet and thinks of Magnus.

 

He reappears in another dimly-lit room, peppered with candles and velvet sofas and exotic rugs.

Standing in front of him is, impossibly, Magnus.

His hair is slicked back and he's dressed in what looks like a frac and a top hat.

Alec looks out of the window. There are horse-led carriages in the streets.

 _This can't be_ , Alec tells himself, just as the warlock registers his presence.

“And who might _you_ be? And _how_ did you get in here?”

Alec had never heard Magnus talk to him like that. His voice is cold, threatening even.

 _That's how Valentine has found the Mirror_ , Alec realizes, _he's found it in the past._

“Magnus,” Alec says and the warlock raises an eyebrow at the mention of his name.

Alec raises his hands in a placating gesture.

“Listen, I know you don't know me but I- I need your help. It's important, I-”

“All I know is that you came into my home, uninvited,” Magnus looks at him up and down. Alec wonders how odd he must appear in his leather clothes. A strange, armed Shadowhunter barging into his home. Alec couldn't blame Magnus for feeling threatened and reacting accordingly.

Still, Alec doesn't have the time for this.

“Whatever it was your plan, you can tell Branwell I'm not interested,” Magnus continues. There are sparks forming around his fingers.

“What, Branwell?” Alec says, “No, I'm-” he licks his lips, tries to think.

A man comes into the room, he has horns on his forehead.

“Magnus, are you ready? We're going to be late and Camille-” the man stops, taken aback by Alec's presence.

Magnus opens his mouth to answer and Alec takes a chance, comes forward, grabs him by the arm, “ _Please_ ,” he says, “you have to believe me.”

Magnus goes dangerously still. Slowly, the warlock looks down at the hand holding his arm, then his cold gaze travels back up to Alec's face.

“I _know_ you,” Alec says, speaking fast, trying to let his sincerity show, “Or I will. You're Magnus Bane and… and the Camille your friend was talking about is Camille Belcourt, you bought her a necklace for the price of your London house. Or- fuck, maybe you haven't done that yet.” Alec takes a quick breath, “Look, I- I can't explain, there's no _time_. But I know you and _you know me_. And I _really_ need your help.”

But Magnus is not looking at him any more, his gaze is on Alec's chest, he's looking at-

_Oh._

Alec lets go of Magnus' arm. Slowly, the warlock extends his right hand to catch Alec's amulet into his palm.

Magnus' eyes widen and when he looks back up at Alec there's something like wonder in his eyes. Shock too.

On impulse, Alec grabs the hand Magnus has closed around his pendent with his own. “ _Please_ ,” he says one last time, looking at him in the eyes.

“What do you need?” Magnus asks.

Alec takes out the scrap of Valentine's shirt.

 

They appear on a silent clearing. Alec, Magnus and his warlock friend, Ragnor.

There's a large body of water in front of them, illuminated by the moon.

If this is Idris, if Valentine is really in Idris, this must be Lake Lyn.

 _There_.

Alec sees Valentine by the lake's shores, half-crouched over the waters.

He runs forward, his feet hitting the tall grass as he calls his arrow and quiver to him.

“Wait!” Alec hears Magnus' voice calling him back but there's no time to lose.

As he comes closer he can see that Valentine is crouched over a limp, lifeless figure. This close, he can hear him talk: “A new race of Shadowhunters-”

Alec nocks his arrow, draws the string, lets it fly.

Valentine catches it mid-hair. It's such a perfect déjà-vu of the first time he met Lydia, Alec is left stunned for a moment.

Only for a moment. He unsheathes his seraph blade and charges forward, going ankle-deep into the water, splashing wildly as he runs.

As his blade comes crashing against Valentine's, Alec sees sparks of magic starting to fly towards the sky.

 _Fuck_ , he thinks, _too late, you're too damn late, Lightwood_.

From a distance, he hears Magnus' voice. Probably trying to break up the ritual but Alec doubts there's much even he could do at this point.

Above them, light is starting to coalesce into the sky.

Fuck, where did Valentine find the third Mortal Instrument? Alec can see the Sword, strapped behind Valentine's back, and the Cup the man is clutching in his other hand, but there's no Mirror.

Valentine's blade catches him on the forearm, then the tight. Alec screams, feeling his skin burn.

His mouth fills with water as he finds himself pushed under.

He can't breathe, his vision falters.

The image of Valentine holding him underwater wavers and vanishes. Instead, he sees the man reaching back to his limp sacrifice. Alec's blood runs cold as he sees that the face belongs to sweet little Max.

Max's eyes are dead but still Alec can hear him screaming, asking for his help.

Alec shakes his head, trying to get the image out of his head, it can't be, it can't-

He comes to the surface, sputtering, raising up to stand shakily on his legs. Around him, Valentine's grip has gone slack in wonder.

Alec follows Valentine's gaze and sees the light starting to take a vaguely winged, human-shaped form.

 _The Angel_.

Quickly, Alec calls to him one of his arrows, drives it into Valentine's neck.

He watches as blood spouts out, watches the man turn his eyes towards him, his expression of wonder turning into one of utter surprise.

Then, to his horror, he sees Valentine's face transform into Jace's, sees Jace's blue-amber eyes looking back at him in shock and betrayal and for a moment Alec can't breathe.

 _What have I done_.

He gathers Jace's body into his arms as it falls back down, watches Jace's mouth fill with blood as he starts to wheeze and fight for breath.

 _Just focus_ , he thinks desperately, _it's the water, making you see things_.

A moment later, his vision clears and it's Valentine's lifeless body he's holding, his eyes wide open to look at the sky.

Alec takes a shaky breath.

Above him, the light becomes brighter as Raziel starts to come into being.

Alec can feel the Angel's righteous fury like a physical thing now, can feel its pressure against his own skin.

 _This is the end_ , Alec realizes.

He looks at the shore, sees no sign of Magnus.

 _Please, please, let him be gone_ , he thinks.

Alec looks up one more time, looks at Raziel, taking shape above him. And then his gaze falls back to the lake's water, reflecting the pale moon and the Angel's terrible light.

 _Of course_ , he realizes. _The Mirror, hidden in plain sight_.

His skin is beginning to burn.

Alec reaches for Magnus' amulet one more time.

He closes his eyes.


	2. Magnus

The green glow of the portal vanishes and, with it, Valentine and Alec.

With Valentine gone, his demons have become aimless, vulnerable, turning against one other.

They take them off, one by one, and then take care of Valentine's Shadowhunters, the few that are left.

And then, Magnus conjures up a knife. He slices his palm with a hiss of pain.

“What are you doing?” asks Isabelle, her eyes still wide with shock.

“Bringing him back,” Magnus replies.

 _Or at least I hope so_.

“Stand back,” he commands.

He places his hand on the floor and draws a wide circle with his blood.

Then he steps back and murmurs the words.

He finds what he's looking for. He tries to get it back but it's too much, too hard. It won't budge.

“I- I need help,” he croaks, holding out a hand, “I can't do it alone.”

Isabelle grabs his hand. And then Jace his wrist. Then Clary and Simon and, yes, he has it now, red and pulsing, calling to him.

With one final effort, he _pulls_ his magic to himself and suddenly someone is standing inside the circle he drew.

Dark hair, wet and plastered to his head, and bleary, gorgeous eyes.

 _He's alive_.

It's Alec, standing with the hunched shape of another body half-sprawled against him.

 _No wonder I felt some drag_ , part of Magnus wonders absurdly.

“Alec!” he hears Isabelle exclaim as she runs towards him, sees Jace grabbing her by the arm, holding her back as he draws out his seraph blade. “That's Valentine!”

And it clearly is. One of Alec red-feathered arrows is also sprouting from his neck, Alec's hand still fastened around it.

Red-tinted water is trickling down the floor.

Slowly, Alec's hazel eyes move to focus on Magnus', only to fall close a moment later as Alec collapses to the ground, dragging Valentine inert body with him.

Magnus sees Isabelle and Jace rush to catch him, but his own body seems to think this must be an excellent idea because Magnus finds himself losing consciousness soon after.

 

Magnus is on his way to the infirmary. He stops at the door when he hears talking.

“-the Cup and the Sword back. Maryse and Robert are going to be back to the Institute any moment.”

Magnus hears rustling of clothing and he's relieved to find that Alec's guest is leaving. He has no intentions of delaying his own reunion any more than necessary.

“Thank you,” Jace is saying then, his tone serious, “For killing him.” And Magnus experiences a moment of almost discomfort. He didn't mean to eavesdrop.

Just then, he hears Alec ask about him and he can't possibly be forced to put this off any longer. “Here,” he says coming in.

Jace gives him a startled look, then he moves from his seat.

“Well. Going to find Clary now, buddy. Give you guys some privacy. Magnus,” Jace greets him as he moves toward the door.

“Jace,” Magnus answers with a nod and moves to sit down on the chair that Jace just vacated. On the other side of the bed, Isabelle is fast asleep on the other chair, one of her hands still intertwined with her brother's.

“Hey,” Alec says. A slow, sweet smile is stretching his lips and, stars, Magnus had thought he'd never see that smile again.

“Hey yourself,” Magnus says.

Silently, Alec offers him his other hand and Magnus takes it gratefully into one of his owns, letting the touch anchor him.

 _I thought the image of you jumping into that portal would have been the last one I'd ever have of you_ , Magnus thinks. _I thought I wouldn't be able to retrieve you from my own past. Not alive._

He bends down to press a kiss over Alec's fingers.

“Hey,” Alec says again and Magnus raises his head to look at him. “It worked. You got me back.”

Magnus smiles. “How are you, darling?” Magnus asks. “Clary told me you had seraph blade burns and a bad case of poisoning.”

“I,” Alec says, “Yes, tired, I guess, but I'm OK now. It was Lake Lyn's water, I'm better now,” he repeats with a smile, “How are _you_?”

“Fine, just needed an hour or twelve of rest.”

Alec chuckles, then licks his lips as if wanting to say something but then thinking better of it.

“So, the- the first time we met-” Alec tries after a moment, “I mean, the first time _I_ met you, you already knew?”

“I knew you were someone I would have given my heart to,” Magnus says, looking into Alec's eyes. “I didn't know if you would have given it back.”

“Your-” Alec's hand raises to touch the amulet on his chest. Magnus sees that the pendent has lost his red hue and is lying almost inert.

Magnus moves to cover it with his other hand. Then, he raises up to lay a kiss on Alec's mouth, just a brief contact of lips against lips, pausing a moment to kiss Alec's forehead too, his nose pressing against Alec's soft black hair.

When he sits back down, the amulet is shining red again.

Alec's lips part in surprise and, oh, Magnus wants to kiss him again. Wants to hold him tight and never let him go, never again.

Magnus sees him swallow, feels Alec's hand move into his hold, tightening his grip.

“I only knew that a man had tried to summon angel Raziel” Magnus continues, “and that someone that I… love… that I would have loved,” he makes a vague motion of hands, dismissing the fact that he doesn't really know which tense to use, “would have come back in time to stop him. And afterward, I spent my days hoping and dreading the moment I would have seen you again.”

“I- I do, I mean, I did.” Alec says breathlessly. “I mean, of course I-” He stops, starts again.

“I know I've been confused,” Alec says, “I- I thought I loved- For the longest time I did my best not to think about my feelings for Jace, not to feel what I felt, not to _be_ who I am. But when I was- while I was fighting Valentine- The only thing I could think about was that I had to make it, had to survive in order to get back to you, to the Magnus that knew me, who knew who I was.”

Magnus watches him licks his lips.

“The Magnus who loved me.”

Magnus takes a slow breath. Then he comes closer and kisses him, slow and sweet, lips and tongue and wet suction. After, he moves to press his forehead against Alec's.

They stay like that for a long time, breathing the same air, neither of them talking, just taking time to appreciate the contact.

“Yes”, Magnus says, “Even when I didn't know you, I _knew_ you were for me. And I-” Magnus pauses, trying to find the courage to speak. “I can't believe death could tear us apart so easily now. Not us, I wouldn't allow it. Not now that I _have_ you, that I have you back.”

He thinks, but doesn't say: _Sometimes, I think I'd rather kill myself than be without you_.

Magnus closes his eyes and bends down to give Alec another kiss.


End file.
